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Korean BBQ — gogi-gui — is the meal most first-timers are both most excited about and most nervous to do “wrong.” Good news: there’s no test. It’s communal, forgiving, and the staff have seen a thousand visitors fumble the tongs. Still, knowing the rhythm makes the whole thing smoother and a lot more fun. Here’s how it actually goes, start to finish.
Ordering: it’s simpler than the menu looks
Meat is ordered by the serving — **인분 (inbun) — and most places have a two-serving minimum**, so you can’t order one portion for one person. Two people, order at least two servings and go from there.
If you only learn one word, learn samgyeopsal (삼겹살) — thick-cut pork belly. It’s the most widely available cut, usually the cheapest, and what most Koreans default to on a casual night. It’s the safe, can’t-go-wrong first order.
Menus in tourist areas and chains often have English, and almost every Korean BBQ menu has photos of every cut — pointing at the picture works perfectly.
Who does the grilling?
This depends on the restaurant, and it’s the part that confuses people most:
- At most casual, affordable places, you are the chef. Staff bring the raw meat and leave. One person in your group picks up the tongs and scissors and runs the grill.
- At premium places — especially Hanwoo (Korean beef) restaurants — the staff grill and cut everything for you. You just eat.
And yes, scissors are normal. You use them to snip the meat into bite-sized pieces right on the grill. Tongs in one hand, scissors in the other — those are your tools.
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The sides you didn’t order
Once you order meat, a spread of small dishes — banchan (반찬) — arrives: usually four to eight little plates of kimchi, pickled things, sometimes a thin egg dish or salad. They’re **free, refillable, and meant to be eaten with the meat**, not as a starter while you wait. Don’t be shy about asking for more of one you like.
How to build the perfect bite (ssam)
This is the heart of it. Take a leaf — lettuce or perilla (깻잎) — and layer in:
1. A piece of grilled meat 2. A dab of ssamjang (the savory dipping paste) 3. A sliver of garlic or a bit of kimchi if you like
Wrap it up and — this is the rule everyone learns the hard way — eat it in one bite. Try to take dainty nibbles and the whole parcel falls apart in your hand.
A little table etiquette
None of this is mandatory, but it’s how locals do it:
- Pouring soju? Use both hands, especially when pouring for someone older. Wait until everyone has a glass, say **”건배 (geonbae)”**, and take the first sip together.
- By custom, the oldest person at the table takes the first bite — a small nod of respect.
End on a stew
Koreans almost always close out a BBQ meal with a bubbling pot of doenjang jjigae (fermented soybean stew) or kimchi jjigae. After all that grilled fat, the deep, salty broth is the perfect finish — order one to share when the meat’s winding down. That’s the move that tells everyone you’ve done this before.
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Sem Kim has lived and worked in Seoul for over a decade. He writes about the practical side of navigating Korea as a foreigner — immigration, transport, local services, and the parts of daily life that guidebooks tend to skip. His work draws on firsthand experience moving through Korean bureaucracy, neighborhoods, and systems that aren’t always designed with international visitors in mind.